So this may be my final update about Sanura’s evaluation stuff because I think I’ve shared almost everything I wanted to. Unless something unexpected is in the reports they send me I probably won’t have anything new regarding this. I did want to share how Sanura handled the appointment and what I learned in the process.
When we first told Sanura she was going to be evaluated it was hard. I didn’t expect her to get as upset as she did. She cried and we comforted her and talked about it. In the week leading up to her appointment we prayed together about it and explained who she was going to see and what we would be doing. She didn’t seem nervous. When we got there and we went back to see the social worker and I was telling her everything she got a little emotional and the social worker and I both explained to her why we were talking about her. She said that she didn’t like it. I understood that. We were talking about things that she’s doing that are not necessarily good things to be doing. It was difficult for her. I just hope that we talked with her and explained things enough that it will not have a lasting effect.
This was a huge difference from what I went through with Adrian so it was really eye opening to what some other parents dealing with autism may be experiencing that I never experienced with Adrian. I can say in a couple of aspects it was easier dealing with Adrian’s appointments and diagnosis. It was pretty obvious, really obvious, what was going on with Adrian. His autism signs are pretty classic and to me, the diagnosis was a no-brainer. He had autism, it was clear. Adrian was young and didn’t know what was going on. His first evaluations were around 20 months old…too small to remember or really even care what was going on.
There was all these new concerns with Sanura, my biggest concern was her self esteem. She’s old enough to understand all of what we’re talking about so it made me think, is she going to think they’re something “wrong” with her? Is she going to think that Glen, I, or her teachers don’t like her personality? Is she going to think it’s her fault that she doesn’t have friends? These are all things I didn’t have to worry about with Adrian, at least not at the time. Now that he’s getting a little older I may run into more of these issues. Another thing I was worried about was an under or over diagnosis. Again, it was obvious what was up with Adrian…with Sanura not so much. I didn’t know what they were going to say and I’m still going back and forth in my mind if I should have pushed for the PDD-NOS diagnosis. It’s hard not to second guess yourself as a parent, in fact second guessing is my parenting specialty…I’m the best at it.
Have you ever heard this autism quote?
“The difference between high-functioning and low-functioning is that high-functioning means your deficits are ignored, and low- functioning means your assets are ignored.” – Laura Tisoncik
That’s my main goal is to notice my kids deficits and assets and help them along the way.